Funny Valentines Day Status, Short Quotes and Funny Messages

Funny Valentine’s day status and messages. It’s again the season of love and the time to celebrate love life with your lover! Valentine Day is the way to come more closer and show the feelings of heart. And it’s good to make some fun on this special day to make love life happier and bring a smile to loved ones face. Now, take a look through the best collection of Funny Valentines Day Status which are too hilarious and sarcastic also! Pick up some funny valentines day status and share on Whatsapp either you may tag your lover or friends on Facebook to make them smile with the help of these funny valentines day statuses! Also, don’t forget to upload selfies with funny valentine’s day captions on Instagram or Facebook. You may use some tricky flirting captions while chatting with your girlfriend/boyfriend on Snapchat!

Funny Valentines Day Status

I love you just the way I am!

When people ask me what’s the best thing about you, I say nothing. I don’t want them to fall in love with you too.

Don’t blame me for loving you madly, it’s all your fault that you have everything I’m so fond of!

There’s just one thing I want to change about you that’s your last name. Happy Valentine’s Day!

My love for you is like a fart that can’t be contained. Bursting out aloud in all its glory and fragrance.

Love is like peeing your pants everyone can see it but only you can feel it. Thanks for being the pee in my pants.


The only card I want for Valentine’s is VISA.

Did Adam and Eve ever have a date? No, but they had an Apple.

If I were a hunter, then I must be a bad shooter because every time you cross my mind, I miss you.

Do you know what’s my favorite thing in this world? The second word of this text.

The police are on the way to arrest you for stealing my heart, hijacking my feelings, and driving me crazy. See you in court!

I’m so happy for you, that you’ve got the most good-looking boyfriend ever.

I feel for you and totally understand if you get jealous all the time. I’d feel the same way if I had such a hot boyfriend.

You are every girl’s dream come true. But never ever take that for granted, else I’ll be your worst nightmare.

You May Like : Valentines Day Status for Singles

I just saved a bunch of money on valentines day by switching to single.

I’m going to spend Valentine’s day with my x….. Box 360.

What did the boy bird say to the girl bird on Valentine’s Day? Let me call you Tweetheart!

Funny Valentine’s Day Captions

I want to LOL you all night long. Happy V-day!

It is impossible not wanting to kiss you every time you smile!

You are the only one with whom I want to do a million things.

7 billion smiles and your’s is my favorite. Vday wishes!

It’s not my fault that I fell for you, you tripped me. Happy Vday, Darling!

I already killed some helpless flowers for you… what else do you want?

Who needs men when I’ve got my girls? Happy Valentines’ Day everyone.

keeps hearing that the right person will come along… I think mine got hit by a truck.

After a while, I eventually fell in love and there was nobody to pick me up.

Your love is better than chocolate. Better than anything else that I’ve tried.

You are the reason I wake up with a smile every morning. You are the secret to my peaceful nights.

You May Like : Valentines Day Captions

On this Valentine’s days… Please don’t make me choose between you and porn. Shit…I mean popcorn!

No, I don’t think it would be appropriate to give him your Valentine’s Day gift at the restaurant.

Do you want to surprise your boyfriend during February 14th? Shave your legs.

Valentine’s Day Flarting Status

Are you ready for a kissing fight? Or do you think you are going to lose?

The stars must be jealous. You shine way better than them!

I am going to call the police right now. Why did you steal my heart like this?

The only regret I have is not knowing you since the day I was born.

Congratulations! You are my first repetitive Valentine.

If I don’t meet your standards for Valentine’s date, then please lower your standards.

Let’s commit the perfect crime, I’ll steal your heart and you’ll steal mine.

Funny Valentines Day Status & Short Funny Messages

Are you lost? Because heaven is a long way from here!

I’m no organ donor, but I’d be happy to give you my heart.

Close your eyes and if you see nothing that’s my life without you.

Don’t ask me how much do I love you just count all the stars in the sky.

Nothing enters my mind after you have occupied it.

Excuse me, please empty your pockets I think you stole my heart.

Need More : Best Flirt Status

I thought happiness started with an H. Why does mine start with U?

I finally got my past, present and future tenses correct today. I loved you. I love you. I will love you forever!

Excuse me…Hi, I’m writing an essay on the finer things in life, and I was wondering if I could interview you.

Short Funny Valentines Day Status

You fill the space between my heartbeats.

I wish you would be my emergency contact person one day.

Ok, I’m single, anyone wants to put a ring on it! *wink wink*

I will never get tired of loving you and I hope you don’t too!

Wish our Valentine’s Day sicken all our single friends.

To all my friends who are committed: Happy Valentine’s Day!

Seriously, do I look like Valentine’s person?

What did the painter say to his Girlfriend? “I love you with all my art!”

It would be great if Valentine’s Day came with a fast-forward button.

My love for you is stronger than last year! Happy Valentine’s Day!

For love for you I would even do the thing Meat Loaf wouldn’t do.

Valentines Day is the day that the “V” and the “D” come together.

I hope you noticed that not only the Sochi Olympics opening ceremony was missing a ring.

Valentine’s day. Another great holiday to remind some of us how truly alone we are.

Wish Someone With : Valentine Day Status

I bring my kids to a romantic restaurant on Valentine’s day as a birth control reminder to the other couples.

That awkward moment when you realize that Valentine’s day is approaching fast and the only one you love is your pet.

Sarcastic Valentines Day Status for Whatsapp

Darling, will you be my player number 2?

You would be perfect (if only you lost 20 pounds)

I don’t love valentine’s day but I love half price chocolate day.

I suspect you were cheating, your gift for me was too amazing.

I would love you even if you were so ugly that everyone died.

Love doesn’t have a price tag on it, but all its accessories have.

Already killed some helpless flowers for you… what else do you want?

waiting for 15th February. No fuckers! You read it right. It 15th, not 14th. #IndVSPakMatch

A real confession: You mean so much more to me than my new iPhone!


Valentine’s is near and love is in the air. Don’t breathe.

On Valentine’s day: “I don’t need a girlfriend. My job irritates me every day & that’s enough for me.”

You’ve to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince on the horse.

My only wish today is to run into one of my exes with my new Valentine!

Roses are red, violets are blue, cupids are gay and so are you!

Thanks for secretly becoming my Valentine by hearting one of my tweets on Twitter.

Funny Valentine’s Day Status For Facebook

May your status on Facebook do not change to ‘complicated’ after this Valentine’s Day.

Valentine’s Day is in 4 days so if you are secretly in love with me I suggest you reveal it now.

I wish your Valentine’s Day celebration get a tone of likes.

Anybody knows where the cheapest place to buy 12 red roses is?…..just asking for a friend.

I trust you plan more for Valentine’s Day than Russia prepared for the Olympics.

My love for you is beyond words so don’t expect a Valentine’s Day card from me.

It’s a pity to tell you I’m sorry my period ruined your plans for this Valentine’s Day.

This Valentine’s Day, I am wishing you all the love a somewhat logical string of emoji can convey.

It’s good to know that my Valentine’s Day as a single person is anyway more romantic than married ones.

No, darling, I don’t think it would be appropriate to give you your Valentine’s Day gift at the restaurant.

One day my prince charming WILL come. He just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.

Buying my wife a matching belt and bag for Valentines Day. We’ll have that vacuum cleaner working in no time.

I promise to vote for any presidential candidate, who promise to forbid Valentine’s Day.

My boyfriend told me I can do with him whatever I want on Valentine’s Day, so I tied him up and went to the nightclub.

When I am with you, my Mondays become Fridays, my nights are bright and the air is cleaner. What kind of powers do you have?

If you text ‘I Love You’ to a person and the person writes back an emoji — no matter what that emoji is, they don’t love you back.

Short Funny Valentine Quotes

Love is a serious mental disease.

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

It is impossible to love and be wise.

If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?

Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.

Love is a game that two can play and both win.

Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing.

Between lovers a little confession is a dangerous thing.

Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you’re in.

Today is Valentine’s Day. Or, as men like to call it, Extortion day.

More : Valentine Day Status for Whatsapp

All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.

Love is an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch.

This is really a rich collection of funny valentines day status and funny love messages which are too cute to bring a smile in the blink of an eye whom you share, hope you have enjoyed and share with your loved one!

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