Funny Marriage Advice – Quotes and Messages

Getting married is one of the happiest feelings in life. Almost everyone waits for the day and prepares so much in mind from the wedding photos to the wedding dress. Marriage might seem a cake walk from outside but it does not always means enjoying. It brings a lot of responsibilities on your shoulders. You have to think like two rather than thinking about yourself. But there are also some funny facts about marriage. For example, how a husband will react in a given situation or how a wife will respond after marriage. We have heard of a lot of funny jokes based on the very fact. Well, those are the funny moments we expect from life. Here, we are providing you some of the marriage advices which you can send to your soon to be married friends and family to make up their mind or cheer them up by sending them funny marriage advices and quotes.

Funny Marriage Advice/Tips

Marriage is one of the best times of your life. It takes you on a whole new level and then you regret it on every level.

Marriages work well when partners are giving and patient about each other and no matter how much patient you are the other person is always going to test your limits. You can still choose to run.

Marriage is like living your best dream and then waking up to realize that dreams have no relevance with reality. Welcome to the club.

Everyone wants to get married but only few dare to live their life alone and hence they are the happy ones.

Marriage is like a contract and you are bound to stay with each other even if the person annoys the hell out of you.

Marriage is not about happiness because you are only happy on the day of your marriage. Rest of the days are about sulking.

Marriage happens in a day but the worst thing is that it lasts for a lifetime.

Everything seems brighter on the first day of wedding and then the reality sets in. Be strong to handle the reality.

Marriage is like a glue and it always sticks to you. Do you want another reason to stay away?

The problem is with the mind and so keep it away after you get married.

Marriage is a path of sustaining lifelong hurdles. After combating few of them you realize that the biggest hurdle was the marriage itself.

If you are wrong and you shut up then you are right and if you are right and you shut up then you are married.

Marriage is all about trading yourself for nothing.

Marriage is when a man loses his bachelor’s degree to a woman who gets her master’s degree.

Marriage is like going to the same school for life.

You Enjoyed the marriage
and cut the wedding cake
Sooner you will come to know
that it was your mistake.

Marriage is the end of
peace, fun, and humor
Marriages are made in heaven
Soon proved to be the rumor.

Funny Marriage Advice - Quotes and Messages

Made for each other
will soon prove to be a lie.
Now you have one strong reason
to end your life and die.

Funny Marriage Advice - Quotes and Messages

Newlyweds are the reason for each other’s smile,
After one year they can’t Tolerate each other for a while.

Funny Marriage Advice - Quotes and Messages

Funny Marriage Advice For Him

    I hope your marriage will give you surprises, not shocks.

    Get Ready to say sorry without any mistake.

    One drawback of marriage. You can’t Fart on your Bed.

    Congratulation he still thinks that you are a calm and sober girl.

    If you want your wife to listen to you then talk to another woman. She will be all ears.

    My wife and I were happy for twenty years and then we got married.

    Marriage is give and take, you’d better give it to her or she will take it anyway.

    Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is your wife.

    Husband is the head of the family and wife is the neck that turns the head around.

    Marriage is a workshop where husband works and wife shops.

    Marriage is the bond between a person who never remembers anniversaries and the one who never forgets.

    Never laugh at your wife’s choices because you are one of them.

    A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.

    As a husband learn to say “Sorry” even if it’s not your fault.

Funny Marriage Advice for Her

    Men are one manipulative species and you realize this only after you get married to one.

    The best thing about marriage is that you will get to annoy your man for the rest of your life.

    Don’t ever stop flirting with your husband because you never know what might happen.

    After a month or two you soon realize that wedding rings are basically world’s smallest handcuffs.

    A girl dreams of her wedding since childhood and regrets the dreams after she is married.

    The best way to get your husband do something is by making them realize that they are too old for it.

    A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression that he cleaned the entire house.

    Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep beside your enemy.

    90% of being married is shouting “WHAT” to your husband from the other room.

    Make love and not war or marry someone.

Funny Marriage advice Messages

    I was never blackmailed by someone unless I was not married

    Marriage is a very great learning experience.  She will teach you the art of conversation without saying a single word.

    For one year she will be your dear, after one year she will be your biggest fear.

    You know it is a mistake. But you will surely do it. Don’t marry. It’s a scam to ruin your life.

    Your life is going to change and soon it will be in someone else’s control. You still have option to run.

    You enjoyed your wedding thoroughly, right? Now you will regret it your entire life.

    Marriage is like putting an end to your freedom. You will do what your partner says but now the disaster has happened and I can only pity on you.

    All your life you dream of your wedding and then it keeps on haunting you for the rest of your life.

    Happy marriage is a fallacy. It is a trap and you will realize it soon, my buddy. Take care.

    Newlyweds are always happy but the real fun begins after a few years when they cannot stand each other. Best of luck to you!

    Soon your every habit is going to be wrong in your partner’s eye. What they love about you today will be what they accuse you in the near future. It’s a tricky business.

    Marriage is more of like a shock. You wake up one day and decide to get married. And then you feel like dying every day.

    Rather than working on understanding each other you should practice more about saying sorry. Keep it on the tip of your tongue. Keep saying sorry.

    You have heard it right. Marriage is tricky. It is deception yet you are doing it and all I can do is welcome you to the club.


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